Monday, September 12, 2011

How to Date Your Husband

I just returned from a great weekend away with Aqua Man.  We went to Napa, we rode bikes, ate great food, got massages, visited with good friends and had no schedule.  Prior to this Aqua Man kept asking, "Why are we going away?"   It has occurred to me, that maybe I need to date my husband better?  The poor guy is worried when I "schedule" to have fun.  This is not a good sign.  Because I think keeping a marriage alive is one of the most important things we can do; here are some ideas on dating the "Mr."

1. Invite him for a weekend away from home without the kids, when he asks, "Why"  or "What you are up to,"  Don't tell him.  (He asks this because "we" usually have an agenda.)  Just say, "I don't know...I just  want to be spontaneous and be alone with you?"
2. Tell him to bring his golf clubs and road bike. (Just the idea will make him feel warm inside.)
3. Ask him to bring you beer and snacks and pick you up after work. (They like to feel needed and have the illusion they are in control.  This will also divert him, so he does not obsess that you are up to something.)
4. While driving, take your hair down, strip down to a white tank top without a bra and sweats in the car for the road trip. (Watch his face light up and relax at the same time.) 
5. Don't say much in the car, just crank up his favorite music.  (This is not the time to ask him "what he is thinking about?")
6. When you get to your destination have cocktail, cut some salami and pepper jack cheese (dude food) and hopefully watch a fire or sunset.  (Men love fire, it's a cave man thing.)
7.  Don't talk about kids, work or projects you want him to do. 
8.  Be the "initiator" — you know what I mean.  He won't question this.
9.  Tell him how cool he is and what you are grateful for.  Mention, that you are really happy. (Lie if you are not.  You will be forgiven. They do take it personally when we are not. If you don't believe this, get yourself some help.)
10. Don't talk about, the things you "really" think about.  (This will scare him and others.)
11. Do not take him shopping (unless he is a "shopper" or closet metro sexual....This is for you Tommy V.)
12. Give him a massage or foot rub.  Or go and get two for both of you (more my style).
13. Wake up slow, bring him coffee, do not have an agenda and just hang out.  He will look skeptical but just remain calm.
14.  Thank him several times for taking the time to hang out with you.
15.  Repeat regularly.

The moral to the story is don't be a "freak," "over achiever," "woman on a mission" or "high maintenance". This will make him happy, completely turned on and basically want to do anything you want for the next few weeks or longer. (This depends on how much of a freak you are when you return home.)

Please note, I have none of these traits. *me with big smirk on my face*

Peace, Love and Husbands....A

PS The winner of the "Sweet Potato Queen's Big Ass Cookbook" is Diane P.  Make him anything out of this cook book and call it a date!  Thanks for the commenting!  Good things will come to people who talk to me!  Because you know; I'm not a control freak?


  1. I love all the suggestions - I only need to know what to do with the kiddos while we are gone. That seems to be the hardest part of getting away. Hugs 2 you!! Muah!

  2. I Love this... and when I embark I'll have to keep a sneaky list somewhere and pray not to be high maintenance woman on a mission ; )

  3. after 18 years of marriage i would certainly agree with your thoughts...all except for the driving without my bra...that would certainly cause an accident if you know what i mean ;oP

  4. Oh my goodness I am overjoyed. I'm almost in tears because I have had the worst day ever. Make that the worst month ever. And then I just read this blog and got to the bottom and saw that I won the cook book. I am seriously almost crying. What a happy happy thing for me. And I love cooking. Made myself a chocolate cake last night just because sometimes you just need chocolate cake. And just so you know, I am taking Mark away next week for a night away. Can't wait. Thanks Alexis. You made my day.

  5. I have learned so many things from you and this is one of them. How to take care of your man. You are exactly right on all of these items! Tom is a shopper and this is what he loves to do when we go away and he is totally into me. I am one lucky girl!

  6. I think this is absolutely perfect!! I love it!! I think this is 100% needed in a relationship! Great words of wisdom, my friend... :)

  7. Sweeet! May you and your tribe live long and prosper... May your souls prosper in His goodness and truth. Love you A, this is a grrrrreat idea.

  8. um well I made him a cup of coffee this morning from his favorite Barista coffee bar. It mustah been the subliminal messaging from your picture on this post. Oh yah, and the other 3 minute thing. That must count for something right?! LOL I've been spreading that lil nugget of advice around.....It's just funny because my girlfirend and I were just talking about this yesterday. For everyone, but especially when you lead a crazy overscheduled life, you've got to "plan" the spontaneous and keep things spicy. Lotsah luvin your way! & MAW says hi to AM.

  9. @Diane P. this book will make your next month a hoot! Enjoy. Sending the love bomb your way. @Ben you don't have a husband. Pretend you don't know what we are up to, bro. @ Jenn W. so the 3 minute thing..did the "eagle land?" And my wise friend, can I blog about that? "me having anxiety or hot flash now" @ ALL thank you for talking to me! YEEEHAAW.

  10. For so long I have put my kids first...this makes me stop and rethink what life was like before kids...think I have some planning to do. Thanks

  11. This is a really great post. You hit it all right on the head!